I'm sitting here staring at the TOUS bracelet my host mom just gave me as a going away present....and its getting harder to breathe. I hated the woman for so long this year, her and 8 of her 10 kids, but im dying thinking of leaving. "even though I yelled at you the whole year, I want you to have this from me as a memory so every time you look at it you can remember me." (All i have to say is if she really wants me to remember her every time I look at it for my sake i should NEVER wear it) but its so pretty, and I can tell its her being sweet, i gave her a hug for the very first time this year! Now i feel bad for having spent ZERO time with them these past 2 weeks. Its been tough like hell, BUT I NEVER CHICKENED OUT. I didnt change families, i DIDNT COME HOME, I didnt run to the organization, and if anyone tries to mess with me after what ive dealt with this year, they have nooooooooooooo idea whats watiting.

today was SOOOOO chill for the first time in wayyyy too long. Tuesday i went to segovia with my friends, so beautiful! They have this amazing castle which looks completely out of a fairy tale book. It had the pinpoints, the moat, the drawbridge, the slit windows, perched on an incredible cliff...all that was missing were the beautiful women in gowns and knights on horseback (which were fakely inside). Actually its the castle that inspired Disney for the one in Snow white or Cinderella! Cool roman bridges....astonishing cathedral....puny synagogue (haha), FUN. yesterday was MTVdayyyyy!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I HAVE NEVER HAD MORE FUN THIS YEAR! ORISHAS ORISHAS ORISHAS!!! We were insane, i lost my voice screaming till my throat was bleeding! UGHGHHGHGHGHG! Those videos you see of girls almost dying in front of the beatles...those were me and my gals. If i didnt dance off 5 kilos then Im crazy! And shakira....oh my woman. She was so beautiful, and what a voice! And best part, she sang all the songs in english so i could sing along WELL! ANd for "la tortura"...i wont even begin! *sigh* how beautiful. Simple plan was awesome, theyre excelent preformers compared to some of the bands, and they were talking to the crowd in english as if the were dead or retarded, hahahaa. They did keep saying in spanish that they wanted spanish girlfriends, lol. WE had to stand in line for hours, we got there at 4 when it started at 8, but theer were ppl that had been camping out since 6AM!!! Lucky we cut infront of some ppl standing sicne 10AM....got awesome seats. In the entry line i got my watch stolen, half my hair yanked out and some whore tore my shoe! I was beautiful...and my miniskirt got even MINNIER, jaja! PICS coming as soon as i post the june ones! Tomorrow my neighbors from texass are coming to visit me in madrid!!!!!! This should be crazyyy and i get to see the baby! So im gonna pirar and hit the cama.

              SEX  *  DRUGS  * ROCK 'N ROLL

hai hai! Can anyone guess what im doing right now??...My hairS (thanx shone) are drying. *YAWWN* and im so tiered im dying. I got home at 10 this morning from the Tres Cantos fiestas..i....i cant and dont even want to think about it....how the hell did i do that?? Im so fucking tired, i feel like a fish out of water...something absolutely vital for my survival is missing.  The fiestas were absolutely AMAAAAAZING. I dont think ive ever laughed so much in one night...true frienships are made while peeing in the bushes, and real men wear long skirts and armor vests. I got hit on by my oldest man so far....i dance the "double pass" with at least 3 men over 70, these espaniards dont even know what hip replacements are! And mmmm'mmmm....mojitosss.... if anyone knows how to make them youre ALWAYS envited to my party.

Wednesday is MTVday!!!! YAYAYYAYAYAYAAYYYYYYYY anyone want orishas autographs?! or shakira. HA! I get to gooo...youuuu dooonnt....me and my friends are getting there 5 hours earlier to get the best spot...u know where theyre holding the concert??? in the bull-fighting ring!       Oh i got my notes last friday....who passed PE with only going 3 times the whole tri-mester??? Hahaha the teacher is mental, i go to class only 3 times the whole trimester (the last time i practically broke my knee) and i pass with a 7! Everything else was great....the grades are high enough to count for credit in USA...lets see what kind of shit DHS gives me this time...assholes.

OK MY HAIRS ARE DRY and i only have one eye left open....more later! BESOS

Currently Listening Estados de Animo By El Canto del Loco see related

HEY BEIBES! Im writing again as my hairs dry.....this is the best xanga-ing time, i guess. Right now im DEAD, I jsut got back from a theme park, god im exhausted. Its an American theme park (Warner Bros.) and it looked soooooooo much like Astroworld i wanted to cry. It was kinda weird, it seemed like i should ahve been there with some Texas friends, or at least on a band-orchestra trip. Kinda sucked actually....its so unbelievably hot lately, and the lines were wayyyy too long. I went with Elin and her friends, and the whole time Elin wanted to plan her wedding (?) with Leonardo. Basically, in october, when she turns 18, shes coming back to Spain to get married with him, and then shes taking him back to norway where hes gonna live with her cousin! Cool plans! Why cant i have a crazy venezuelan to marry?!?!?! ANYWAYYYY....I think ive been going crazy yesterday....i spent 500 euros this past week just buying everyone presents...i HATE BUYING PRESENTS...and i forgot the most important one, for my host family....ughghghhg now  have to go bacckkkk, really dont want toooo, shopping sucks. Yesterday Leo and I went to get our hair cuts, and as i was looking in the mirror i jsut kinda got bored and said, "i want to get something pierced". So 10 minutes later we're walking into a pharmacy and i got my 2nd holw done!!! YAAAAYYYY.!! Lame, i know, its only a 2nd hole, but anything else and my grandmother refused to ever let me back into her house, and i kinda love her too much to test her.

It doesnt seem like Im about to leave soon. I keep making more and more plans everyday, it doesnt seem possible for this rythm of life to jsut stop. And its gonna keep on going just as fast, just as fun, just as hard even when im gone! next year ill just be walking down the DHS halls, waiting in those crowds to climb the stairs...i just want to "MOO" thinking about it. I DON WANNA GOOOOO! How about everyone i love just come here??? Sounds good, no? Ok...Aqui No Hay Quien Viva is on...ciao amours!

Currently Listening La Tortura [EP] By Shakira, Alejandro Sanz see related

CHO-CHOOOS! Whats up yall?? Im letting my AIR dry (!) cause everyone is sleeping. My heart is still beating from this absolutely INSANE concert i went to tonight. Anyone know who Carlinhose Brown is? Hes a Brazilian singer who sings cranaval dance type songs. WOW! My chocolate goDDDDD...mm! He was on this huge truck vehicle thing in the middle of the major street, Castellana, with all his negrazo god dancers just moving down the street as 5 million people walked along dancing and singing and drinking calimocho. I felt in the middle of Rio during carnaval! 3 hours just walking and dancing like jungle people, you dance with EVERYONE and anyone, drink from everyone and, ughghghghghgh, i love this. I've never SEEN so many ppl, and the smell of human bodies all sweating out alcohol and wine is so fucking nasty. Ive showered and whashed everything 3 times and i still cant get the stink out of my nose! But seeing everyone on everyone, people dancing, laughing, pushing, screaming, singing.... everyone is jsut so happy. Real human pleasure, just being and going.

The rest of the weekend has been just crazy. Thursday i went all the way to Pinto (40 min in train) just to go to the pool with Elin. It was wonderful until the dude she brought made us pay for everything, stole my batteries, and broke her MP3 headphones....jackass. Then i went into Guadalajarra (small city 45 mins north in bus) so see marta. She's been obsessed the whole year for me to go with her to this cafe where they play american oldies thursday night. We went with some of her camp friends, and the music and ambiente were cool, only it was exactly like any Chili's with enlgish songs in spanish accent. Haha really cute though, they all started in a huge chorase (sp?) of "stand by me" and got all emotional!! Awww. Next day marta still had class so i went shopping with some of her other friends, got cool paaaaants, cool belllllllttt, etc. Afternoon we went down the pool cause some friend was celebrating his bday....too bad he has a girlfriend...could have been cool......nada. At night we went to a huge park where all of Guada's kids go to botellon at night, then to some discotecas with birthday boy (dam!). I had a blast, i hadnt danced in such a long time and it did me sooo much good. I dont know what to do next year without this music. Are there any good latin-salsa clubs around who "dont check"? Nothing like spanish music,but some reggeton is all i need to be happy! If anyone knows (or wants to go!) POR FAVOR let me know!!! MMkay, im gonna head out...love everyone, KISS!

HOLAAAA! que pasa nens? Writing in here AGAIN, bam! 2 days in a row..oooh ohhhh. This might be addicting, I can tell my stories in english and they'll actually come out right. Im kinda bleh right now, im just sitting here kinda sick of some certain people...i dont even feel like watching my show. The people here really confuse me sometimes. They almost seem to agressive on life almost. In a society where everyone makes your business theirs too you can run into a lot of trouble. There is the good that comes with it: you never run out of things to talk about, you get way more intimate, you dont have to suffer hard times alone; but at one point you reach a level of personality that is ridiculous. One thing you do for one person as  favor another will take as a incredible insult. You do something that you feel is right for yourself, and because youre so closely linked to others they see it as a personal offense. Ive learned a lot from these people, and how to relate with others in a totally new way, but im sick an tired of having to judge every fucking action of mine. Not everything i do is meant as a personal offense, and im sorry if its a fault of mine, but dam it, yes! i AM selfish sometimes...and we all deserve to be...and so id like it very much if the way i choose to spend my free time, the places i visit, the people i talk to, and the things i do for myself would be left that way, MINE, and i dont have to be responsible to any other puta who decides its her business as well. THANKS.

....other than that, i went to the Reina Sofia today with Elin....saw some beautiful art, and ran into some lost american students. Then went shopping at zara and i bought my 8th skirt in 2 weeks! I have sooooo many skirts now, i havent worn a pair of pants in AGES. then i went to gadea's house cause they made some mad creepes i had to try. we made home made chocolate spread from Cola Cao and boiling milk (yummmmmmm), and had a serious discussion over her 9 remaining silk worms (hahah que tontas). Then came home, got in trouble for eating yogurt and then vegetables...since i got in trouble, of course i had to get in trouble again, and so marta takes out the phone bills and starts pushing them in my face...hate the fucking cowwww...talked to mckenzie, my soul mate, and now im going to bed. LOVE YOU ALLL, KISS!